Woah.

I just got insrtructions to make my internets faster by Benn Jordon (of all people; hence said woah). I'm not in any way saying I previously thought he was stupid, just that I know him as one of my favorite electronic artists, not my IT guy. Long story short, it works! Though, I think I've heard it before.


So, what do you invisible people of the internet want to hear about my life? Oh! I got invited to a Halloween party! Go me! The kid's a year younger than me, but what the hell, he's pretty cool. I have to dress up, and I think I'm going to go in my cosplay stuff (which I forgot to mention is without gloves. They were such a hassle to be made I think I'm going to forget them altogether). What else internet?

I don't think there's much else to talk about... I should probably turn the comment option off, because like a lightbulb that doesn't need to be there, it's being wasted.

Gah. (remix)

So I got the last issues of Gravitation (:D) but I'm not in the mood for reading. I'm too embarrassed with these things. I refused to pull them out at school, like at all. Anyway, I took my PSAT. UGH. The Math part kicked my ass, two times! I think I did ok on my reading, but Math was so bad. Man these blog posts are getting worse and worse quality wise. Oh well.


Uh, let's see. What else? Nothing... man my life it boring.

Scary Movie 4 and Saw II

I saw both, and I have a few words on them.


Saw II: AMAZING. I am always caught off-guard by these movies. They manage to have gore and still be a fun experience. And I'm one of those people who try to guess what's going to happen every three seconds, and I was like PUMPING my friend Zac for information, but he wouldn't tell me and it pissed me off. So, in the end, well I was like "Wtf...". I really like where they went with it though. I like that girl a lot, and I think it's badass how she's the new killer. She's just badass like that. (really bad review.)

Scary Movie 4: As with all of the Scary Movies I laughed a lot. I also noticed a lot of Airplane-esque humor, which is the kind of humor I love. The crapping scene from The Village part, well, just goes to show how immature I am. I laughed for like five minutes. I am still laughing about it.

All in all both movies were enjoyable. Thankyou directors of the world!

NEKOCON

Yay, Nejocon is arriving for the 9th year now~! This was my first convention, so I hold it in a dear place in my heart. It may be smaller than Otacon, or Katsucon, but it sure packs a punch (and it's getting bigger every year!)

After Nekocon of course, there comes Katsucon, which I will be going to (hopefully) in Febuary. It's all the way in D.C., so I hope my bros up for driving!

GAAAAHHHH

I NEEED MORE GRAVITATION. I didn't go to school today, and I forgot I was getting 7 of the last Gravitation mangas. I read the five that my friend gave to me on Saturday, and forgot all about it.

And now I'm all depressed. :(

And then I wish there were two.

I. Need. A. Goddamn. Counterpart.


In other words, gimme someone to love, world!

Beta version of Blogger.

I think I made a wrong decision to switch. This is like, flashy. I don't like flashy, I liked Blogger because of it's low-key-ness. I hope all this "LOOK NEW FUCKING FEATURES," shit goes away. Not the actual features, just the ads for them. Jesus Christ.

Show me the money.

Man, these cheesy titles never get old.

Anyway, they serve a purpose and are always accurate; I just got $80 transfered to my account, and now I can buy frivolous stuff! Maybe a game or two, or some headphones, or some sweet cosplay stuff, hell maybe a new hat.


I don't know, having $80 worth to toy around with, well it could bring a man to tears. Especially one that loves money, and loves spending it.

n.n


Oh yeah, how could I not rememebr this (<--- has memory failure)?! I have (for like, the sixth time, so don't get your hopes up) decided what I want to do when I graduate, even though it's about two years from now. Which makes me think, am I being too ready? Is it bad to want to graduate? And with my grades as they are now, is it unrealistic to be even making, no less phantasizing, plans about the future? I dunno the answer to any of those questions! Anyway, where was I? OH YEAH, plans for the future. I think I am going to end up taking two years of college (VCU) double majoring in art and Japanese. Then I'm going to get into the JET program. I know, I know, weeaboo this, and weeaboo that, but am I wrong to take up an oppurtunity so great? If you look at it, it really is "an oppurtunity I can't refuse." You get a two-year college degree (anywhere, mind you), you enter yourself in, hopefully they accept you, they fly you over (free or not, I forget), you get a payed apartment, and teach a bunch of snot-nosed little Japanese middle-schoolers English! You don't even have to know Japanese, that's just a suggestion (of course I want to so I can understand all the bad-mouthing they'd be doing).

This of course is pretty different than my previous plans, despite them being abstact. I basically wanted to be an artist, and go to college just for that. But you see, this is where the hero of our story gets himself into some mess! I have noticed that, well, I think I'd rather have art as a hobby than a full-time thing. I don't know why I just said that, I literally just came to that conclusion about myself. I've just looked at so-called "artists" today, and I don't see myslef as that. Don't get me wrong, I love drawing. But, I just don't think I am able. I've looked at myself, outside of my shoes (for once) and have noticed that I am at an extreme amature level. On top of that, I have looked at myself in my art class at school. Sure, I'm probably the best in there (no, I'm not being cocky), but I still can't keep up. I am lazy, and I half-ass things because I have no motivation. Even if I have potential, will that attitude carry me on as a proffessional artist in the future? How will my boss take it when I half-ass some piece because I'm too lazy to get off my ass and do work. No matter how much passion I have for "art" I am still a lazy fuck. Woe is fucking me. But then that brings me to the thought of writers. They are lazy fucks, so are writers and I the same? Do they treat artists the same way? And even if you took away all that laziness, made me into a diamond (without increasing skill of course) I still wouldn't be that good of an artist. My drawings are kiddie qork compared to big-time manga artists. They could whip up a page in a few minutes, and it would look amazing (it's true, I've seen it!).

As you can see, I am very thoughtful tonight. I want to be an artist, but I am doubting myself. I want a future, but I don't think there will be one handed to me, and I don't think I can mold my own. I am, for once in my life, getting that "What the hell am I going to do?" feelings. Sure, drawing is fun, but maybe it's too hard for me. Maybe teaching a bunch of Japanese kids English is the rout I should take, and make drawing sit in the back? Or maybe I should suck it up and make myself better with training and discipline.

Well, I am sure about one thing... I'm not going to get a wink of sleep tonight.


And I apologize about the typos, I typed this as I thought.